Category Archives: Money Funnies

Three Things to Ponder in 2008

1. Cows 2. The Constitution 3. The Ten Commandments COWS Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they […]

High Tech One Ups

Three tax professionals, two younger, and one senior citizen were sitting naked in a sauna. Suddenly there was a beeping sound.buy canada levitra online http://healthinschools.org/wp-content/languages/new/canada/levitra.html no prescription The young tax pro pressed her forearm and the beep stopped. The others looked at her questioningly.buy antabuse online pmilv.com/wp-content/languages/new/cheap/antabuse.html no prescription “That was my pager”, she said.buy […]

Rules to Live By

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.https://theteacherpreneur.com/wp-content/languages/new/resume-writing-service-reviews.html 2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often. 3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car. 4. Artificial intelligence is no match for […]

Liver and Cheese – or Enhance Your Creative Writing Skills

Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.buy bactroban online pmilv.com/wp-content/languages/new/cheap/bactroban.html no prescription https://www.pharmalucence.com/wp-content/languages/new/stromectol.html The […]

Vote Carefully – Voter Guide from Farmer John

[Warning: Blue humor. Do not read on if you are easily offended.https://www.pharmalucence.com/wp-content/languages/new/synthroid.html ] John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called ‘pullets’, and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs. The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn’t perform went into the […]

Inner Neighborhood Services

I have a friend who is president of his homeowners association in the Dallas, Texas, suburbs. They were having a terrible problem with litter near some of his association’s homes. The reason according to Wallace (my friend) is that six very large, luxurious new houses are being built right next to their community. The trash […]

The True Value of Consultants

A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization. (Is this the real reason Anderson went out of business?) A while back, we took some friends to a new restaurant, ‘Steve’s Place,’ and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little […]

2007 DARWIN AWARD WINNERS!

THE 2007 DARWIN AWARD WINNERS WERE SELECTED FROM 17 NOMINEES: ==================================== What Goes Up Must Come Down (8976 votes) 80% The Enema Within (4252 votes) 80% Support Group (3728 votes) 78% Weight Lift (2191 votes) 78% Stop. Look. Listen. (1763 votes) 77% Beer for Bears (2225 votes) 76% Mole Hunt (5366 votes) 75% A Prop-er […]

Political Science for Dummies

Note: this is humor. Don’t be offended! DEMOCRATIC You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. Barbara Streisand sings for you. REPUBLICAN You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So? SOCIALIST You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a […]

Fore! …And After

Arthur is 90 years old. He’s played golf every day since his retirement 25 years ago. One day he arrives home looking downcast. “That’s it”, he tells his wife. “I’m giving up golf. My eyesight has gotten so bad that once I’ve hit the ball, I can’t see where it went.” His wife sympathizes, and […]

Life Explained in simple terms

On the first day, God created the dog and said: ‘Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.’ The dog said: ‘That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten […]

A Billion

The next time you hear a politician use the word ‘billion’ in a casual manner, think about whether you want the ‘politicians’ spending YOUR tax money. A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases. A. […]