Tag Archives: jokes

E-nun-ci-ate!

  The  Lone  Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian war party. The Indian Chief proclaims, “So, you are the great Lone Ranger.  In honor of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. But, before I kill you, I will grant you three requests. What is your first request?”

You know you’re living in 2011 when…

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.https://alvitacare.com/wp-content/languages/new/zithromax.html 2. You haven’t played cards with your friends in person in years. 3. You have a list of 24 email addresses and Twitter accounts to reach your family of 3.

A Practical Solution

A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head. In a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The biker pulled over and said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so […]

As We Rely More and More on Computers

News agencies and businesses are using computers to edit their copy. Here are some of results from the last decade or so.   A bit more than ten years ago, the Fresno California Bee, part of a respected media group, installed a new production/editing computer which even included features for automatically editing “political correctness” into […]

Not What They Seem?

Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family.   The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion’s guest room. Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement.https://jaymorrisonacademy.com/wp-content/languages/new/research-paper-helper.html     

Pass the Biscuits

When I was a kid, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then.  And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned biscuits […]

Making Your Case

See, this is how you win audits, court cases and suits. It’s all about how you present your case.buy flexeril online pridedentaloffice.com/wp-content/languages/new/over/flexeril.html no prescription https://drugeriemarket.co.uk/wp-content/languages/new/nolvadex.html A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, “I’d like to buy some cyanide.https://drugeriemarket.co.uk/wp-content/languages/new/sildenafil.html ”

Resourceful Marketing Attracts Converts

Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, a Texaco Gasoline station was just a block away.https://www.grapplearts.com/wp-content/languages/new/homework-assistance.html     She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant […]

Ask TaxMama Issue 586 – Happy Valentines Weekend

Dear Family, Happy Valentine’s Day weekend. Are you doing something romantic?  We sneaked off and took our romantic weekend last month. I found a winery resort in Temecula where each guest room is a separate villa. They are so popular, they’ll be adding another hundred or so this year. What’s your favorite romantic getaway?  (Just […]

Wish You Had Never Said It?

We all have those moments when we wish we could pull back something we’ve just said. Here are some moments these people will never forget.  Public Address. A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price […]

The Value of Friends? Priceless

One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name. Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down. It took the remainder […]

Keeping up With the Times

When I bought my Blackberry I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed up under duress for Twitter and Facebook, so my seven kids, their spouses, 13 grandkids and 2 great grand kids […]