When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 glasses of sparkling cider theory… A professor stood before his philosophy class with some items on his desk in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he […]
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1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice. 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4. Put decaf in […]
Patron: Waiter! Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I’ll be your Support. Waiter. What seems to be the problem? Patron: There’s a fly in my soup! Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time. Patron: No, it’s still there. Waiter: Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup. Try eating it […]
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing ‘fairly well’ for my age. A little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking him, ‘Do you think I’ll live to be 85?buy xifaxan online blackmenheal.org/wp-content/languages/new/mg/xifaxan.html no prescription https://londonbes.education/Media/new/best-essay-writing-service.html ’ He asked, ‘Do you […]
A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, “Honey, I’ll be right back.” “Where are you going, coochy cooh?” asked the wife. “I’m going to […]
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE! JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was […]
DEAR DOCTOR: Q: I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that’s it… don’t waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer. That’s like saying you can extend the life of […]
Today TaxMama hears from Dorothy in Texas who says, “My husband is employed by the railroad and we live in a fifth wheeler.https://www.calmandgentledentalcare.co.uk/wp-content/languages/new/azithromycin.html Our original home state was New Mexico. We now travel to railroad sites in Texas for employment.buy uk singulair online www.mabvi.org/wp-content/languages/new/uk/singulair.html no prescription We rarely go to NM. Our home is rented. […]
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.buy bactroban online pmilv.com/wp-content/languages/new/cheap/bactroban.html no prescription https://www.pharmalucence.com/wp-content/languages/new/stromectol.html The […]
Arthur is 90 years old. He’s played golf every day since his retirement 25 years ago. One day he arrives home looking downcast. “That’s it”, he tells his wife. “I’m giving up golf. My eyesight has gotten so bad that once I’ve hit the ball, I can’t see where it went.” His wife sympathizes, and […]
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 cups of coffee. A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very […]
My father was completely lost in the kitchen and never ate unless someone prepared a meal for him. When Mother was ill, however, he volunteered to go to the supermarket for her.buy xifaxan online www.epsa-online.org/wp-content/languages/new/prescription/xifaxan.html no prescription buy canada orlistat online http://healthinschools.org/wp-content/languages/new/canada/orlistat.html no prescription She sent him off with a carefully numbered list of seven […]