The Accountant, the Tax Attorney and the Actuary

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An accountant tries horseback riding: Yesterday I had a near death experience that has changed me forever.   I went horseback riding.  Everything was going fine until the horse starts bouncing out of control. I tried with all my might to hang on, but was thrown off.

   Just when things could not possibly get worse, my foot gets caught in the stirrup. When this happened, I fell head first to the ground. My head continued to bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down.
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  Just as I was giving up hope and losing consciousness the Wal-Mart manager came and unplugged it.


An accountant, a tax attorney and an actuary were dining together at a fashionable restaurant.

“With income tax being so complicated, we accountants are all doing quite well these days,” the accountant commented. To prove it, he pulled out a $5 bill, applied a match to it and used it to light his cigar.

“With so many people engaging in tax avoidance and the IRS auditing more wealthy taxpayers , we lawyers are also doing very well these days,” the lawyer mused.

To prove his point, he got out a $100 bill, applied a match to it and used it to light his cigar.

“With the new Affordable Care Act, we actuaries are doing even better,” the actuary said. To prove it, he wrote out a check for million, applied a match to it and used it to light his cigar.


The doorbell, rings, and a man answers it. Here stands this plain but well-dressed kid, saying, “Trick or Treat!
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” The man asks the kids what he is dressed up like for Halloween. The kid replies, “I’m an IRS agent.” Then he takes 40 percent of the man’s candy, leaves, and doesn’t say thank you.


Courtesy of  Robert E. McKenzie, Attorney at Law

Your clean humor is welcome!

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