Here are some funny interpretations of words you already know and love. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
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Let’s face it – English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant or ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. There’s no bread in breadfruit.