Money Funnies

Ready for the Paddy wagon

October 14, 2011

Paddy goes to the vet with his goldfish. “I think it’s got epilepsy” he tells the vet. Vet takes a look and says “It seems calm enough to me”. Paddy says, “I haven’t taken it out of the bowl yet”.

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What have we learned in 2066 years?

October 7, 2011

“The budget should be balanced, the Treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed lest Rome become bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.” – Cicero – 55 BC [...]

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Put On your Thinking Cap – A Quiz

September 23, 2011

Put your thinking cap on and don’t cheat… 1. In the 1940′s, where were automobile headlight dimmer switches located? a. On the floor shift knob b. On the floor board, to the left of the clutch c. Next to the horn

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Retirement Planning – Economizing on Nursing Homes

September 16, 2011

With the average cost for a Nursing Home per day reaching $192.00, there is a better way when we get old and feeble. I have ascertained that I can get a nice room at the Holiday Inn for around $80.00. That leaves $112.00 a day for beer, food (room service), laundry, gratuities and special TV [...]

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Marriage Seminar

September 9, 2011

While attending a marriage seminar on communication, Tom and his wife Peg listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.”

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Sand, Stone, and Paper

September 2, 2011

Two friends were walking through the desert . During some point of the journey, they had an argument; and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand , “today my best friend slapped me in the face .” They [...]

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How to Tell the Truth – Creatively

August 12, 2011

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the priest sitting beside her, “Father, may I ask a favor? “Of course, child. What may I do for you? “Well, I bought an expensive electronic hair dryer for my mother’s birthday that is unopened, and well over the Customs limits. I’m afraid they’ll confiscate [...]

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Ask TaxMama Issue 610 – Keep Your Fork

August 5, 2011

Dear Family, The week just seems to fly by when you have interesting and exciting things to do. And we definitely have those around here! We’ve been working with the folks at NASBA to arrange for continuing education credit for CPAs who take TaxMama’s® courses and the SFV Breakfast roundtable. It takes a lot of [...]

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Keep Your Fork

August 5, 2011

There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things ‘in order,’ she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she [...]

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How to Bathe the Cat: A Matter of Perspective

July 29, 2011

Creative solutions are important, both in the business world and at home. Those who can think outside the can are most apt to get hired. 1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

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