1. Throw out nonessential numbers – including age, weight and height. Let your doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them. 2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches are a downer. 3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, fishing, puzzles, crafts, biking, hiking, whatever. Never let
Doncha love surveys? There’s always a study costing millions to tell us something we know instinctively. Here’s one you’ll love.
I just received my tax return for 2012 back from the IRS. Not clear why. I am confused! They are questioning how many dependents I claimed. I guess it was because of my response to the question: “List all dependents?”
You’ll need the following: a cup of water a cup of sugar four large brown eggs two cups of dried fruit a teaspoon of salt a cup of brown sugar lemon juice nuts and a bottle of whiskey.
ONE: Don’t miss the boat. TWO: Remember that we are all in the same boat! THREE: Plan ahead. It wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark.
‘Twas Right After Thanksgiving (in California) And all through the house, Not a channel was showing any shows worth the price.
THE SENILITY PRAYER God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough. I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest. Then I decided on bookkeeping. No accounting for taste.
Just in case you weren’t feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. 1. The people who started college this fall across the nation were born in 1998. 2. They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and did not know he had ever been shot. 3. They were not born yet when […]
An elderly man in Miami calls his son in New York and says,” I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.” “Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams.