On the first day of creation, God created the dog.

On the second day, God created man to serve the dog.

A baby turtle was standing at the bottom of a large tree and with a deep sigh, started to climb. About an hour later, he reached a very high branch and walked along to the end. He turned and spread all four flippers and launched himself off the branch.

On landing at the bottom in a pile of soft, dead leaves, he shook himself off, walked back to the bottom of the tree and with a sigh started to climb.

Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the princess. But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would  melt. No matter what, metal, wood, plastic-anything she touched would melt!

Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.  The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, “If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured.”

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he began crying, God appeared and asked him, “Why are you crying?”

The woodcutter told Him that he had dropped his axe into the water.

Now that tax season is over (at least, phase I), today TaxMama® wants to treat you to a little fun.  Until now, I’ve preyed on your fear of taxes. Today, let’s play with your fear of flying.

A teacher asked her class to write notes to God.
Here are some of the notes the children handed in:

Dear God:
I didn’t think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday.  That was cool!

In honor of the Easter Dinner and Passover Seder, we present…

A minister was asked to Easter dinner by one of his parishioners who he knew as being an unkempt housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the  dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life.

Taxes are terrifying to so many people.

But the fact is, some of us just find the whole subject irresistible. We talk about taxes; think of ways to reduce taxes; dream of loopholes; are compelled to help others find tax breaks; and love to read all about the nuances and changes.

WE are the Tax Nerds.

1. You ask what the Cafeteria’s core competencies are.

2. You decide to reorganize your family into a “team-based organization.”

3. You consider dating as test marketing.

The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

On the other hand the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.